Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Do You Worry?

A question I am often asked when people learn that I am a police officer's wife is:

Don't you worry about him?

When I met my husband he was almost finished his training at the academy.
He asked me this question himself.

Would his work be too worrying?

Fortunately I'm an optimist and always expect the best will happen.
Then I'm crushed when it doesn't.

But this perspective is very helpful when your husband is a police officer.
He is not working 'the beat' at the moment.
For now he has a very safe office job, which I couldn't be more thankful for today.

When he was working in the car, I did occasionally worry.
If he was late home without being able to call.
But other than that, I found shift work annoying but didn't constantly worry about him.

Today I cannot stop thinking about the wife of the Gold Coast police officer, Senior Constable Damian Leeding.
I wonder did she feel the same way as me.
I wonder how I would cope if I received the news she did just days ago.

And just moments ago he died in hospital.
I felt like I was hit with a ton of bricks.
The tears came and haven't stopped.
I am devastated for his wife and every other police officer's wife that has lost her husband.
I cannot shake the image of her with her two small children.

I want to say thank God it was not my husband, but that sounds so unfair.

I am just so sad.


  1. A very poignant post thea. I can only imagine the intense worry that a policemans wife endures. You girls are a special breed. X

  2. Hugs to you Thea. Your husband does a vital job and he is able to do so because you are supporting him. Thank you to both of you for your bravery.


  3. My former husband was a police officer and I will never forget the feeling of worry. Love to you Thea xxx

  4. Hugs to you, Thea. Nothing I can say to take away your anxiety and your grief for the slain police officer and his family... Your husband's job is a vital one, and we are all graetful to both of you that he can do it. x

  5. I cannot imagine being married to someone in a job like that - you must be so strong. I saw my Mum with my step dad and how she worried and he was an ambulance officer - but night shift in the city was hell for her - she does worry - so she wouldn't sleep till he was home safe. I can't imagine how hard it must be, how you let someone you love do what they want even if it is dangerous. These are stronger women than I. HUGS hon.

  6. I understand how you feel. I am the wife of a retired copper, who worked on the street all his life. He has been in countless stressful situations and has come out reasonably unscathed, where as others were injured, ended up being invalided out, or made the ultimate sacrifice.
    I loved being a coppers wife, espeically when we were in the small communities. It was great the way he was trusted and loved, helping all aspects of his community.
    But guess what! Now he is retired, I don't miss coppering one bit!! *S*

  7. I was so sad to hear this morning that they were turning off that poor policeman's life support. Have been thinking about his wife and young kids all day.

    I have so much respect for the work that cops do. And while the chances of something really terrible happening are often quite small, sometimes bad things do happen.

    I don't know how I'd cope having a husband (or any family member) working in a dangerous job. I have so much respect for all policemen and the loved ones that have to stay home and worry about them xxx

  8. I thought of you, you know. And how it must have felt. I read somewhere that his wife, Sonya was also a police officer.

    I'm gutted for this family, and for all of his workmates. And for every police officer's wife (or husband) who tonight is thinking 'there but for the grace of god..."

  9. It's just devastating. I'm so sorry Thea x

  10. It's so tragic. Police and other service workers are so undervalued in our society - and that's a tragedy too. xx

  11. I think because we watch tv shows and movies that have police dying regularly we forget the reality of the families. Thank your husband for taking on this vitally important job.

  12. Incredibly sobering. Cry, cry, cry. Eventually, the tears don't sting. xxxxx

  13. Oh Thea. This story crushed me and has left me feeling so sad and empty, for that poor family. His wife, children, father who flew out from the UK. What a hideous waste of a man's life and the devastation it now leaves behind. It makes me angry, but then what is the point in anger... it doesn't bring anyone back.
    I can imagine how difficult is must be being married to a police officer, but you sound like you handle it in the best possible way. Take care Thea, hope you and your hubby were able to lend support to one another today... and give plenty of hugs to each other too xo

  14. I have known many police officer's and fireman's wives, and happily none have lost their husband, but it must be so hard on the spouses on a continuing basis.

    Don't be sorry that you are happy it wasn't your husband, it doesn't mean you don't feel any less for the wife of the policeman who was killed.

    The families of those who protect their community are special people as well. I know you are.

  15. One of my closest friends is married to a police officer. When they first started dating, he was in the TRG working with the Drug Squad. He has some interesting tales to tell.

    I once asked her the same question...she said she just can't go there. She can't think about it. That works for her.

    Anyway, darl...thinking of you. I think partners of police officers have common ground, so def understand why you feel about the other wife. Terrible.

    I'm sure she would be grateful for your thoughts and prayers.



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