Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Nobody Told Me!

You know how there are many and varied things that you just have no idea about relating to pregnancy or parenting until it hits you (with a big stick)?
I doesn't matter how many books you read (I think I read all of them),
or how many friends or family members go before you and tell you tales sagas dramas truths about them.
There are things you will never know until they happen to you because
nobody tells you!

I never knew that morning sickness would make me feel so bad that all I could do was lie on the couch and moan all day and night.
I never knew that pregnancy would be so painful that every step I took was agony.
I never knew that I wouldn't be able to roll over in bed or breathe properly and that heart burn would be so goddamn annoying.
I never knew that I would have to get up more than once a night to feed my new born babies for months and months and months. (I guess I really had my head in the sand to not know that one.)


I never knew that I would be getting up at night, almost every night, for six and a half years.
I didn't know that there was even the possiblity that I would not get a full night's sleep almost every night for more than six years because

nobody told me!!

So I'm here today to tell everyone who has not yet had children that once you have children, there is a very high possibility that you may never sleep again.

You will have to get up to...

feed your baby (I'm sure you knew that)
rock your crying baby back to sleep
put the dummy back in their mouth (luckily we skipped dummies)
change wet nappies/pyjamas/beds
soothe them if they're scared
lie with them if they have nightmares
clean up vomit
comfort and medicate them when they have a fever
put the blanket back on them if they're cold
put them back in bed if they fall out
get them a bottle

And then on those rare nights when you don't have to get up there is a strong possiblity that one (or more) of your children will join you in your bed and they will toss and turn and kick you and hit you and dack you (oh yes, that happened to me last night!), thus leaving you lying in your bed wondering if you will ever ever sleep again.

So there, I feel I have done my duty.
Now you can't say, "No one told me."

But of course, if someone had told me....

I wouldn't have done anything differently.


  1. So true.
    I add to that list, that no one ever told me that parenting would be harder as it goes on - as your children experience highs and lows and you have to guide them through it. Of course, that is also rewarding, but it's tough when you can't make their boo boos better with a cuddle and a bandaid.

  2. Great post! You said it all. I wish someone had told me, but as you said, I wouldn't have done it any differently.

  3. I realised fairly early in the piece that while I had read all the books, my baby hadn't!

    Farmboy is almost 6. I think my last full nights sleep was early 2005.

  4. It's so true about the books; they sugar coat everything! :)
    I would love to have a descent sleep-in some time soon. 6am wake-up's and the constant picking up of crumbs is hard just on it's own! ha ha

  5. I'm a night-owl anyway, so I think it's going to be getting up during the day that knocks me down :p

    Remind me of this in a year when I have an eight month old...

  6. You are really going to enjoy sleep when they stop waking you up!

  7. OoOoOo I looooooong for the day where I can experience all that....I truly do!


  8. I agree 1000 per cent with this post. I've been up at night 6.5 year as well. It's hard hard hard work and the most self sacrificing thing I've ever done ..... but I wouldn't miss the magic my three bumpkins bring into my life for anything.

  9. I often wondered if I would ever sleep again......I craved my sleep but it passes and here I am I'm sleeping!!

    I just voted for you on babble, if you haven't already would you mind returning the favour....xxxxxxxxx

  10. HEY!
    I am your loyal follower :-D

    I wanted to give you a poke just in case you have missed my Seasonal Shoe PHOTO competition post :-) if you are interested, check my newest entry! Season Greetings! Amber

  11. I don't have children myself but thank you for being so frank.

    SSG xxx

    PS - discovered your blog through the rewind at Allison's blog.

  12. LOve it! the cone of silence around parenthood definitely covers this - mind you, nobody would believe you if you said that people voluntarily sign up for seven years of this crap - and then go back for more. Oh yes, we do, all those mums with more than one kid. Which would be me.

    Thanks for Rewinding at the Fibro!


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