Friday, July 9, 2010


Awhile ago I blogged about a parenting expert who made me a little cranky because he said...

Remember REDUNDANCY is your aim as a parent!

I happened to see him on TV this week also, he was still saying the same thing, and I still felt the same way.
However this time, I was hearing his words from a different perspective.
Not as a mother,
but as a daughter.

This week my mum had a heart attack.
It was severe.  The doctor said on a scale from 1 to 10, it was a 9.
He also said that most women do not survive heart attacks that severe.

To say that my family is shocked is an understatement.
To say that we are incredibly lucky she is still with us is an even greater understatement.

I finally got to see her today and for the two hour drive there I didn't want to talk. Just the thought of her brought tears to my eyes. I didn't want to cry when I saw her. I wanted to tell her that I loved her and I was so very thankful that she was alive and will be well soon.

I didn't cry. I did give her a kiss. But I didn't tell her I loved her or how heart wrenchingly thankful I was that I was seeing her, living and breathing, and looking just like she has always looked to me.  My mum, whom I do not ever want to be without.

We've never been a demonstrative family. I don't remember mum telling me that she loves me. But I know she does. I've always known it, and that feeling means so much more than words.

I may not have lived at home for 23 years.
I may not talk to her every day.
I may not ask her for help very often.
I may be 41 with two children and living too far away.
But I still need my mum.

Mum, you will never be redundant.
You are so precious to me.
God gave us an angel, and I thank Him so much for letting us keep you for a bit longer yet.


  1. Wow.

    That's all I can say.

    I'm so glad she's OK xx

  2. I'm having a little cry now. Your mum is very lucky. Thank goodness she is doing ok. I love what you wrote about your mum never being redundant. If our kids think that of us then we have all done a great job. Love and hugs to you. xxx

  3. I am so glad your mum is ok!

    Sending much love and prayers your way!


  4. Oh honey, that is so beautiful. Crying, husband wondering what is wrong is very undemonstrative wife.

    Please tell her you love her. I reckon it gets to a point where no one says it and it feels too awkward to be the first.

    After last year, I wish I had of just cuddled mum in big bear hugs whenever I saw her and kissed her face and told her how much she means to me.

    But I didn't. And now I'll never get to.

    You've got a second change honey, take it my the reins and go for it.

    So glad she's on the mend. What a horrible fright xx

  5. Oh Thea, sobbing here because I know how you feel. I still say thanks to the powers that be every day that my dad survived too.
    Lots of love to you sweetheart and a speedy recovery for your mum xxx

  6. *chance - not change :)

    Word Verification: scans - WTF?

  7. Beautiful post Thea!

    I'm so glad your Mum has come through this. You have both been in my thoughts the last few days.

    Mums are far too precious to ever be redundant.

    big hugs

  8. Mums are so special.

    I'm so glad she's OK, Thea, and I hope she makes a full and speedy recovery.

    And it doesn't matter when/if/how often you say you love each other, you're right - actions matter far more than words. We don't say it much in my family either, but we all know it.

  9. That is so touching, Thea. I have tears in my eyes, thinking of my own Mum, of course.


  10. How frightening for you all, I am so glad she is recovering and wish you many, many, many days and years together to come.

    Sometimes the words shine through your actions - your time, your thoughtfulness, your service - it's not just about the words xx

  11. Oh Thea, I am so glad you Mum has survived this heart attack - she must be a strong woman. I am sure that she knows you love her, just as much as you know she loves you. Wishing her a speedy recovery and some peace for you and the family after this huge shock. xxx

  12. Crying here too. Thea, I am so sorry, I really am.

    Tell her you love her? Please?

    My Dad didn;t tell me he loved me until the day before he died. I am so uttrrly thankful that I had that gift from him, and that I was able to reciprocate.

    Huge hugs to you sweet Thea. xxx

  13. Maybe it's time to start a new tradition by telling your mum she is loved. So glad she is better. hugs

  14. Oh Thea, I'm so glad she's doing better.

    As someone who has lost both parents, I would urge you to tell your mom that you love her.

    Hugs xxx

  15. Clearly your mumma is made of some tough stuff. I'm glad to hear she's doing well. You should tell her you love her. I haven't spoken to my mother in over 6 months. I wish it didn't have to be this way but somehow it's easier. It's a lot easier to love her when she's not telling me constantly I'm wrong. And I want to love her.
    You're very fortunate to have that bond.

  16. Oh hon - I am so glad she is okay and doing well - I know how you feel - I need my Mum too - I've almost lost her to cancer, heart attack, cancer (again), her own misery and now overseas...but she is still sort of there...thinking of you and your family

  17. I'm so happy to hear that your mum is on the road to recovery, such a scary time for all of you.

    It's times like these that you truly realise life is so fragile. We need to live more in the now, not in the past or the future.

    And we need to let the ones we love know that we do.

    Big love to you and your family xo

  18. Beautiful Thea :) Your mum is very special.... she raised you.

    Cuddles and sunshine

  19. Beautiful. When my dad had a heart attack a few months ago I felt similarly, but I was nowhere near as eloquent in putting down my feelings.
    I'm just thrilled for you that your mum is such an obviously strong and wonderful woman!! xx


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